North Dakota State. What do you have to do there to graduate? Milk a cow with your left hand?

You're 83? Really? You don't look it. I would've guessed 81 or 82.

You know they say money can't buy happiness. Give me 50 bucks and watch me smile

Have you ever been to Glens Falls? The city limits signs are on the same post.

[On Sting] He threw a sucker punch. There's the sucker who threw the punch. Him the the Bart Simpson hair doo.

There's only two kinds of music I don't like....Country and Western.

He's the only man I know of who can hide his own easter eggs.