We create a mask to meet the masks of others. Then we wonder why we cannot love, and why we feel so alone.

This is how we know we are in a loving relationship. We are blooming, and the one we love is blooming as well.

We are what we think about. When we stay fixed on one person, thought or situation, we get caught in the grip of self-centered thoughts. The more we give attention to that which is upsetting, the more strength it has to rule our lives.

When we are able to receive life's challenges as koans rather than problems, they become interesting and exciting, rather than ponderous and depressing.

Who you are is always enough. If your partner wants something different, it does not reflect upon you, but upon their needs and fantasies.

Another simple and powerful way to dissolve problems is not to dwell upon the outcome of your actions. Instead, learn to value each action (no matter how small or large), to do it with complete attention. Your joy and satisfaction comes from doing each action with a whole heart and mind. Results and consequences then take care of themselves. When you are not absorbed by concern for outcomes, how much anxiety can you ever have?

What we pay attention to expands. What we pay attention to we become.