There's no bad publicity except an obituary.

I was court-martialled in my absence, and sentenced to death in my absence, so I said they could shoot me in my absence.

I am a daylight atheist.

When I'm talking to people I like to stop and quote myself. My quotes have a way of spicing up conversation.

Critics are like eunuchs; they can tell you what to do, but they can't do it themselves!

I am a drinker with writing problems.

I never felt so much at home as I do in New York. I must be a devil.