One drink is to many for me and a thousand not enough.

I think weddings are sadder than funerals, because they remind you of your own wedding. You can't be reminded of your own funeral because it hasn't happened. But weddings always make me cry.

The most important things to do in the world are to get something to eat, something to drink and somebody to love you.

A pedestrian ought to be legally allowed to toss at least one hand grenade at a motorist every day.

Scream at God if that's the only thing that will get results.

Whatever you hold in contempt is your jailer.

A man is fortunate if he encounters living examples of vice, as well as of virtue, to inspire him.