I think weddings are sadder than funerals, because they remind you of your own wedding. You can't be reminded of your own funeral because it hasn't happened. But weddings always make me cry.

Message? What the hell do you think I am, a bloody postman?

In a society which really supported marriage the wife would be encouraged to go to the office and make love to her husband on the company's time and with its blessing.

Nothing hurts more than the friendly letter that one never got around to writing.

If it was raining soup, the Irish would go out with forks.

I'm a drinker with a writing problem.

There's no one, no one, loves you like yourself.