The Bible was a consolation to a fellow alone in the old cell. The lovely thin paper with a bit of matress stuffing in it, if you could get a match, was as good a smoke as I ever tasted.

Other people's interruptions of your work are relatively insignificant compared with the countless times you interrupt yourself.

When two men fight over a woman it's the fight they want, not the woman.

A general and a bit of shooting makes you forget your troubles ... it takes your mind off the cost of living.

There is no human situation so miserable that it cannot be made worse by the presence of a policeman.

One drink is to many for me and a thousand not enough.

I am a drinker with writing problems.