My ex-wife has never broken 150. I wish she would stop telling people I taught her how to play golf.
You always nag the one you love
When your first baby drops her pacifier, you sterilize it. When your second baby drops her pacifier, you tell the dog: 'Fetch!'
I don't think I'll live long enough to shoot my age. I'm lucky to shoot my weight.
Someone once told me that there is more to life than golf. I think it was my ex-wife.
What's the point of washing off your ball when teeing off on a water hole?