I'll always remember the day I broke ninety. I had a few beers in the clubhouse and was so excited I forgot to play the back nine.
My ex-wife has never broken 150. I wish she would stop telling people I taught her how to play golf.
I don't think I'll live long enough to shoot my age. I'm lucky to shoot my weight.
The only place you're sure to find love is at the end of a letter from your mother.
In Minnesota it's so cold some nights you have to wear two condoms.
The only thing in my bag that works is the bug spray.