Talking to a golf ball won't do you any good, unless you do it while your opponent is teeing off.
I don't think I'll live long enough to shoot my age. I'm lucky to shoot my weight.
You always nag the one you love
I used to go to the driving range to practice driving without slicing. Now I go to practice slicing without swearing.
Someone once told me that there is more to life than golf. I think it was my ex-wife.
The only thing in my bag that works is the bug spray.