The only place you're sure to find love is at the end of a letter from your mother.
My ex-wife has never broken 150. I wish she would stop telling people I taught her how to play golf.
I used to go to the driving range to practice driving without slicing. Now I go to practice slicing without swearing.
Someone once told me that there is more to life than golf. I think it was my ex-wife.
We learn so many things from golf: how to suffer, for instance.
I don't think I'll live long enough to shoot my age. I'm lucky to shoot my weight.