People, not just reporters, are more interested in politics than in government, so the actual issues wouldn't be something that interested them.

Anybody caught selling macrame in public should be dyed a natural color and hung out to dry.

Kerr's Three Rules for a Successful College: Have plenty of football for the alumni, sex for the students, and parking for the faculty. If law school is so hard to get through, how come there are so many lawyers?

With humor, it’s so subjective that trying to think of what the ideal reader would think would drive you crazy.

Why in the world are you a Republican?

I never did very well in math - I could never seem to persuade the teacher that I hadn't meant my answers literally.

In modern America, anyone who attempts to write satirically about the events of the day finds it difficult to concoct a situation so bizarre that it may not actually come to pass while his article is still on the presses.