The price of purity is purists.

I never did very well in math - I could never seem to persuade the teacher that I hadn't meant my answers literally.

Everybody is who he was in high school.

Being on a book tour is a lot easier than reporting.

Marriage is not merely sharing the fettucini, but sharing the burden of finding the fettucini restaurant in the first place.

If it's inappropriate to write about, if there's nothing funny about it, then it's not funny.

Money not spent on a luxury one considered even briefly is the equivalent of windfall income and should be spent accordingly.