I can't tell a joke to save my soul. It's just not my thing, though I love to listen to jokes.

It's almost impossible to be funnier than the people in Washington.

Originally, I came from Texas, and we lived on - I guess you'd call it welfare, what we called relief.

there were times when I was more at home in front of millions of people than I was at home.

In '57, I got a job at the Blue Angel nightclub, and a gentleman named Ken Welch wrote all my material for me. I lived at a place called the Rehearsal Club that was actually the basis for a play called Stage Door.

Because nobody goes through life without a scar.

You have to have faith that there is a reason you go through certain things. I can't say I'm glad to go through pain, but in a way one must, in order to gain courage and really feel joy.