I'm really not that funny in real life. But I am the best audience one could find. I love to laugh.

My interesting diet tips are eat early and don't nosh between meals. I mean, I can pack it away.

But I don't begrudge anybody, because I know how hard it is to have that dream and to make it happen, whether or not it's just to put a roof over your head and food on the table.

Originally, I came from Texas, and we lived on - I guess you'd call it welfare, what we called relief.

You know, one wonderful thing that came out of my Enquirer experience is that, in my case, it was ruled tabloids are magazines. Which means they didn't have the protection that a newspaper has.

Comedy is tragedy plus time.

Because nobody goes through life without a scar.