No one ever said life was fair. Just Eventful.

I love the writing. I love the idea of typing and seeing it on the computer and printing it out myself and, you know, moving sentences around. I like that.

Adolescence is just one big walking pimple.

You have to have faith that there is a reason you go through certain things. I can't say I'm glad to go through pain, but in a way one must, in order to gain courage and really feel joy.

Have you noticed that all you need to grow healthy, vigorous grass is a crack in your sidewalk? Having a baby is like taking your lower lip and forcing it over your head.

Comedy = tragedy + time.

I don't remember a time when I wasn't waiting for a scab either to grow or to fall off my knee.