I despise those shallow religious comics. Dennis the Menace, for instance, is the most shallow. When they show him praying - I just can't stand that sort of thing, talking to God about some cutesy thing that he'd done during the day. I don't think Hank Ketcham has any deep knowledge of things like that.

Here I am flying high over enemy lines in my Sopwith Camel searching for the Red Baron. Who's that behind me? It's the Red Baron! He has me in his sights! Give my regards to Broadway.

I’m torn between the desire to create and the desire to destroy.

Only in math can you buy sixty cantaloupes and no one asks what the hell is wrong with you.

Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It is already tomorrow in Australia.

Dear Valentine, I love you. Whoever you are.

Life is like a game, Charlie Brown... Sometimes you win... Sometimes you lose." "I'll be happy if I just make the playoffs.