In life, it's not where you go, it's who you travel with.

One moment, please... We interrupt our regular program to bring you this special bulletin: It's a nice day outside.

I wonder if there's such a thing as a spiritual dentist? I think my whole personality is full of cavities!

A good education is the next best thing to a pushy mother.

Sometimes you lie in bed at night, and you don't have a single thing to worry about...That always worries me!

Dear Great Pumpkin, Halloween is now only a few days away. Children all over the world await you coming. When you rise out of the pumpkin patch that night, please remember I am your most loyal follower. Have a nice trip. Don't forget to take out flight insurance.

Life is full of choices, but you never get any!