According to Life & Style Weekly, 50 Cent may be working on Lindsay Lohan's next album. Finally, a match made in rap heaven. He's a convicted drug dealer who's been shot nine times, and she spent 84 minutes in prison. This is a big step for Lindsay. The last time Lindsay got near a black guy she ran over his foot.

I wish it was that easy to get turned on for me - at this point, I need a bottle of Belevere and a fighterjet.

That's what my perfume would smell like, margarita and vodka.

When I don't know what to do, I just open my mouth. Why won't anyone date me?

A lot of people think that keying a car isn't the right way to get back at a guy. I disagree.

You got married recently to a rapper. It doesn't take them long to impregnate women.

Let's all help each other be a little bit better at being human beings.