You know what they say, when one door closes, another Belvedere opens.

But then, like George Michael in a men's bathroom, I got cocky.

How do you think jail was?! I got face raped by a woman... and I think I may have liked it.

My relationship with my father had been on the proverbial fritz since the time I was fifteen and called the police to report him for child molesting. He had never molested me, but I wanted to have a party that weekend and needed him out of the house.

In a statement to the Associated Press earlier in the year, Jamie Lynn said she didn’t have a boyfriend. She said, ‘I’m keeping my options open.’ And by options, she meant legs.

People push my buttons, so I'm going to react.

No one has ever said to me 'go home and make a baby.' I have been told several times to go to Planned Parenthood and make the baby go away. Happy Hannukah.