My life and my legs have been an open book.

I don't mean to be a racist but if you're going to get raped by a Japanese guy, it's not going to hurt at all.

Austin and I proceeded to knock back a couple of Ketel One and grapefruit juices, which happened to be my drink of the moment. Someone told me that grapefruit was a great detoxifier and I decided I wanted to start cleaning out my liver WHILE I was having a cocktail.

David Hasselhoff was hospitalized after falling off the wagon again. He probably got used to drinking too much, because for years he never had to worry about driving anywhere - his car drove itself.

People push my buttons, so I'm going to react.

Kristen Stewart always looks like she's posing for pictures taken in a basement by her creepy uncle.

[Late-night host] is not really a job for a woman. You can't have kids and be a late-night host.I mean Samantha Bee has children, but you're there all day and all night. No one has a life outside of it. I would never try to have a family. I care much more about a career anyway, than having a family, so that's my own prerogative. It's just not something that a woman.