I was so frivolous for so many years. It was so much fun, but you feel guilty about the brain energy you use to think about whether some celebrity was sleeping with another celebrity. The conjecture that goes along with that. You feel like your mind has been shot apart.
Chelsea HandlerIt's a dream come true to have someone else portray me. Because I've been living this life for a long time, and I'm over myself.
Chelsea HandlerMost republicans are against contraception because they don't care about it. You can't get pregnant anally anyway.
Chelsea HandlerNo one has ever said to me 'go home and make a baby.' I have been told several times to go to Planned Parenthood and make the baby go away. Happy Hannukah.
Chelsea Handler