I'm playing like Tarzan-and scoring like Jane.

Don't look for excuses to lose. Look for excuses to win.

I've heard people say putting is 50 percent technique and 50 percent mental. I really believe it is 50 percent technique and 90 percent positive thinking, see, but that adds up to 140 percent, which is why nobody is 100 percent sure how to putt.

Somebody give me a banana. I'm playing like a monkey, so I might as well eat like one.

If you buy a book on golf instruction buy the thinnest book you can find. The thinner the book, chances are the easier and more elementary the instruction. It can do one of two things: help you more or hurt you less. Both are good compared to the alternative.

No one has as much luck around the greens as one who practices a lot.

Golf is the only sport that a professional can enjoy playing with his friends.