Community college is like a disco with books: "Here's ten dollars; let me get my learn on!"

When you die at 72, no matter what you die of, it's natural causes. Even if you get hit by a truck, it's natural causes. 'Cause if you was younger, you'd have got out the way!

I've been away from my two daughters at a very important time in their life.'I have missed most of Girl Scout cookie season.Last night Zahra, my youngest called me up and said :"Daddy how come we never sell the most cookies? How come Mrs. Dunn wins every year?"'

I ain't shootin' nobody. So call me a faggot! When the war's over, I'll be the faggot with two legs, thank you!

My kids don't have a trust fund, they have a debt fund. Oh my God, they're $4 million in the hole.

Only black people in the whole neighborhood, so let's break it down: Me, I'm a decent comedian, I'm a'ight. Mary J. Blige, one of the greatest R&B singers to ever walk the Earth. Jay-Z, one of the greatest rappers to ever live. Eddie Murphy, one of the funniest actors to ever, ever do it. Do you know what the white man that lives next door to me does for a living? He's a f*****g dentist.

I think if I were to get as big as I could get, it does change your mind-state. I think like the little man. I think like the underdog. I don't want to change that.