Black comics, they only watch Black comedians. You're a comedian; you're not just a Black comedian. You're a comedian. I try to get that through to everybody.

You can't fake comedy - it's not like a movie, where a director can just cast a pretty face.

People really cared more about women's hair. But nobody takes you seriously with Jheri curls is what we've deduced. If you got an Afro and you go "Fight the power" people will follow you. If you got a Jheri curl, people just laugh.

You don't pay taxes - they take taxes.

Community college is like a disco with books: "Here's ten dollars; let me get my learn on!"

Give me a black man, a white woman, a giraffe, a zebra anything but another white man! That last one f***ed up my roof!

The two best things you can do for a person is have sex or make them laugh.