We treat racism in this country like it's a style that America went through. Like flared legs and lava lamps. Oh, that crazy thing we did. We were hanging black people. We treat it like a fad instead of a disease that eradicates millions of people. You've got to get it at a lab, and study it, and see its origins, and see what it's immune to and what breaks it down.

So there's a cloud of rage around me, but being an artist kind of changes that. No matter what you thought coming in, what ignorant thing you believed, you're in show business for two years, you're like, "OK, I was wrong." It's hard to be mad at any particular group of people when you're an artist.

Being a comedian is a lot like being an athlete. If you're Carl Lewis and you're the fastest, then no matter what you're the fastest.

If you can keep your son off the pipe and your daughter off the pole, you're ahead of the game.

God bless America. And no place else.

I hate niggas! I hate em! I wish they'd let me join the Ku Klux Klan!

You can never make a woman happy, it's impossible. I've never met a happy woman in my life. They're always complaining about something.