My relationship with my daughter is gonna affect her relationship with men for the rest of her life... Sometimes I'm walking with my daughter. I'm pushing her in the stroller, and sometimes I just pick her up and stare at her, and I realize, my only job in life is to keep her off the pole.

I took my AlDS test. You start reflecting... You start thinking about every nasty, skank-ass... It's like the movie Scrooge, and the Ghost of Pussy Past comes.

I like the tradition of the Oscars. I like that some of the greatest comedians ever have hosted the show.

Nobody really wants to be a stand-up, they want to get on TV.

People really cared more about women's hair. But nobody takes you seriously with Jheri curls is what we've deduced. If you got an Afro and you go "Fight the power" people will follow you. If you got a Jheri curl, people just laugh.

I think anybody in front of a crowd is a comedian.

All you crazy white people "I'm American!", all you did was come out of your mother's pussy on American soil. That's it. That's it! What, you think you're better than somebody from France 'cause you came out of a pussy in Detroit?