The only acting you ever see at the Oscars is when people act like they’re not mad they lost. Nicole Kidman was smiling so wide, she should have won an Emmy at the Oscars for her great performance. I was like, "If you’d done that in the movie, you’d have won an Oscar, girl."

I pride myself on being the guy who can do Def Comedy Jam and Charlie Rose. And do well on both.

You cannot win in a fight against women, cause men have a need to make sense

Give me a black man, a white woman, a giraffe, a zebra anything but another white man! That last one f***ed up my roof!

Smart is knowing if you're dumb. Knowing when to shut up and to listen to people that are smarter than you.

A comedy club is a place where you work out material, you're trying material.

The government hates rap. That's why they don't arrest anybody that kills rappers! Only the good ones are dead, man! Only the good ones: Biggie dead, Tupac dead, Vanilla Ice still alive! They don't fill out a police report. They don't even have a chalk line when it's a dead rapper, they just take a piss around the body.