No one knows why, but second only to eating the brains of the living, the dead love affordable prefab furniture.

People always stay the age that they died at. My big brother died of leukemia when I was six. He was eight. Now when I think of him, he's always eight, and he's still my big brother. He never changes, and the part of me that remembers him never changes.

I love you above all things, even pie.

One day the good times had to keep on rolling, and all of life's horseshit would turn to circuses.

...she is too beautiful, I think, to not be inherently evil.

I've got to think that that was unethical," Joshua said. "Josh, faking demonic possession is like a mustard seed." "How is it like a mustard seed?" "You don't know, do you? Doesn't seem at all like a mustard seed, does it? Now you see how we all feel when you liken things unto a mustard seed? Huh?

An original thought would crack your feeble skull like a thunderbolt, you craven vulture.