Wives live longer than husbands because they're not married to women.

Did you know that..........'embargo' spelled backwards is 'o grab me

Nine out of ten Americans believe that out of ten people, one person will always disagree with the other nine!

When you kill someone by chopping off their head, rolling 'em up in a carpet and burning it, you'd better make sure they're dead!

As a kid I watched television 24 hours a day and loved every minute of it. The two shows that always make me laugh and are therefore my favorites are The Dick Van Dyke Show and Fawlty Towers.

I have many favorite artists...Van Gough as one, but he didn't really sing a lot!

Every song a hit, every hit a smack!