The people who influenced me most were the people who said I would never make it. They gave me a thirst for revenge.

Hi, well soon return you to the dyslexic production of Bitty Bitty Chang Chang.

Onstage I do all the stuff I'd never do in real life, like lashing out at people who make me mad or freaking out in a long bank lineup. Performing allows me to fulfill all the sicko fantasies I've ever had.

My mother on her death bed told me, 'Where the hell did that kangaroo come from!?' - it just popped out of nowhere and punched her in the head and caused a cerebral hemorrhage, so I thought I'd move to a country where there were no kangaroos!

Let me play a Man in a scene.

My most important professional accomplishment to date is the ability to keep working with absolutely no skills whatsoever.

It all started with a badly timed bald joke!