You know how it is with writing. You just write what you want to write. There's no way to predict what is good or bad. You just do what you think is funny, and either it works or you're finished. It's impossible to predict anything.

I think everyone should own six guns, even though I don't own any.

With comedians, you have that understanding that we're trying to get laughs.

My name has zero value.

I'm always working on stuff. But they never materialize. I'm always working on movies and TV shows.

A weird sort of awareness set in, like, 'Wow. My stand-up isn't just separate from everything else I do anymore.' With Twitter and Face book, everything is universal that everything everybody says gets seen.

I've been to Japan, I've been to China, I've been to Africa, I've been to the Middle East, I've been to Europe a little bit. I've never been to South America.