Being an American is something I wanted to be for a very long time, probably since I saw the moon landing when I was a child.

I became a terrible drunk or alcoholic - or a good one depending on your point of view.

A casino in South Dakota was robbed by a man dressed as a mummy. The police described the suspect as anywhere between 25 and 8,000 years old.

I used to believe, like many people who come from poor backgrounds, that it gave me an edge, but I think that's just something we have to tell ourselves to get by sometimes. I don't believe that anymore. Children of privilege can be just as talented and clever as anybody else.

There's going to be a new cable-TV channel for dogs. Dogs don't even watch TV. But the schedule came out today. And they've got great shows, like Barks & Recreation and Game of Bones.

Being guilty tends to engender feelings of guilt.

A woman in Germany gave birth to a 13 1/2 pound baby. That baby was so fat his first word was strudel.