I said that the only way I could have a band that would work in the format of my show is if the band were crap. So if I have a band they'd have to really suck.
Craig FergusonA dozen swimming events have already been completed in the Olympic competition. I wonder where they got the name 'Speedo.' It doesn't sound like a bathing suit, it sounds like a breakfast cereal for meth addicts.
Craig FergusonThe worst gift I was given is when I got out of rehab that Christmas; a bottle of wine. It was delicious.
Craig Ferguson