If you absolutely believe that what you do is right, you're bullet-proof.

According to a new study, Hawaii is the happiest place in America to live. And I thought it was just a great place to pretend you were born in.

Now, I know Obama was trying to take the long view, but talking about solar energy in the middle of the oil spill is like watching your house engulfed in flames and saying, 'We really should change the curtains.'

This story is true. Of course, there are many lies therein and most of it did not happen, but it's all true. In that sense it is deeply religious, perhaps even biblical.

I have to do a show which is of interest to me, or else I'm lost.

The world can be such a fright, but it belongs to us tonight.

If we are now holding late-night talk-show hosts to the same moral accountability as we hold politicians or clergymen, I'm out. I'm gone.