I think comedy comes more from a low sense of self-esteem, and I certainly have that.

I think when you become a parent you go from being a star in the movie of your own life to the supporting player in the movie of someone else's.

I proved to my own satisfaction that I am madder than I think.

Gas prices - it is $6 a gallon here. People in L.A. are furious. You can't tell, of course, because of the Botox.

Alcohol ruined me financially and morally, broke my heart and the hearts of too many others. Even though it did this to me and it almost killed me and I haven't touched a drop of it in seventeen years, sometimes I wonder if I could get away with drinking some now. I totally subscribe to the notion that alcoholism is a mental illness because thinking like that is clearly insane.

I do love America. And LA is a very short commute to America its like half an hour on the plane.

The devil is not abroad at night in the form of a cat or a wolf or any other animal. He lives eternally in the hearts of men.