I'm a vulgar lounge entertainer, I don't need to wear a tie.

I think holidays create so much pressure because people feel they should be having a good time. But you shouldn't.

Wait! Don't applaud my cheapness! I've got other crap I need help with!

Allowances can always be made for your friends to disagree with you. Disagreement, vehement disagreement, is healthy. Debate is impossible without it. Evil does not question itself, only hope questions itself. Even the incorruptible are corruptible if they cannot accept the possibility of being mistaken. Infallibility is a sin in any man. All laws can be broken and are. Often. Like when a bumblebee flies or an ancient regime is toppled.

Other than the laws of physics, rules have never really worked out for me.

Whoever I had become had to die.

Some people watching CNN were so shocked they started rioting. No, I'm kidding. No one watches CNN.