Sometimes they would just pay me to stay home and not do anything else, which sounds fantastic but doesn't do much for your ego. Its probably a little like getting alimony - the money is nice but has a nasty aftertaste.

If you watch cooking shows on cable, they have lots of British people. Because when you think good cooking, you immediately think Britain.

Strange star-like object over Oslo right before Obama arrives. A gift of a golden medal given by a group of wise men... Nah.

According to a new study, our email is not as safe as we thought. How do they know this? They've been reading my email.

It's a book. It's mine. And it's done.

Thank heaven Election Day is over. No more campaign ads, no more mud-slinging, no more candidates pretending they're straight. It's over!

If you don't vote, you're a moron.