On that same tour we ran into a band at Aylesbury Friars, a biggish venue in Oxfordshire, England. They were a four-piece from Ireland called U2. They seemed like nice fellows and they sounded pretty good, but we didn’t keep in touch. They’re probably taxi drivers and accountants by now.

Insiders say Obama's pretty comfortable around actors. He should be. He has been 'acting' like he was born in Hawaii for a long time.

I've got young kids, so it suits me to do a job which keeps me in town right now.

Whoever I had become had to die.

The new Pope, Cardinal Jorge Mario Bergoglio, is now Pope Francis the 1st. Francis was not his first choice for a name. But the Vatican wisely talked him out of Pope Boo Boo.

Don't protest outside of a rich man's house in the daytime, you'll just scare the maid, and that's Arnold Schwarzenegger's job.

Scientists say over the next hundred years, the coast of California will sink almost five feet. So the presidential candidates need to do something. Mitt Romney is conflicted. On one hand, he denies that global warming exists. But if California is under water, he would definitely win the next election.