People spend thousands of dollars trying to keep their teeth straight. I just hope we can live in a world where we accept gay teeth.

I was 15 years old when I was in this band; we were called Stag. We used to wear spandex pants and no underwear - we looked like marbles smugglers.

It may be that the fear contains information. Something can be interesting if you get to the other side of that fear.

I got sober. I stopped killing myself with alcohol. I began to think: 'Wait a minute - if I can stop doing this, what are the possibilities?' And slowly it dawned on me that it was maybe worth the risk.

I know that's not the right accent, but I can't do the right accent. It's either the wrong accent or another Octomom joke.

Self help books are pointless. Here's something for you... Men are from Mars, women are from Venus, and self help books are from Uranus.

Canada is not the party. Its the apartment above the party.