People spend thousands of dollars trying to keep their teeth straight. I just hope we can live in a world where we accept gay teeth.

Twas the night before Thanksgiving.

North Korea announced that they have nuclear weapons and they have no plans to give them up. The White House, acting quickly, announced their plan to invade Iran.

Being an American is something I wanted to be for a very long time, probably since I saw the moon landing when I was a child.

....maybe fear is God's way of saying, "Pay attention, this could be fun.

Sober alkies are often asked: "When did you hit rock bottom?" but a more informed question might be: "How many times did you hit rock bottom?

I think comedy as an art involves the audience as a participant as much as is involves the artist.