I salute Rick Perry for the way he's trying to overcome this. Today he came out and said he's not one of those slick politicians, that this just shows his human side, and some third excuse he can't remember.

My mother was tickled and I think kind of proud when my father got hit on my an attractive middle-aged Asian lady who hadn't noticed he was with his family. He was certainly pleased about it.

I became a terrible drunk or alcoholic - or a good one depending on your point of view.

Equestrian and sailing are sports for people growing up on the mean streets of Connecticut.

I know the fashion is that everything is fair game [for comedy material] but I don't believe that.

Scientists say over the next hundred years, the coast of California will sink almost five feet. So the presidential candidates need to do something. Mitt Romney is conflicted. On one hand, he denies that global warming exists. But if California is under water, he would definitely win the next election.

Thanks cows. I appreciate your tastiness.