It seemed that I performed better sober than drunk. Who knew?

114 isn't as old as it used to be they say its the new 104.

I think I'm just someone that just tries to get by. I'm kind of - if it was during the Second World War, I'd be a black marketeer, I think.

Is it really that important? It's just television, for God's sake. It's not medicine or something.

Historically, when Americans don't know what to do next, they go to Paris. Benjamin Franklin is like: 'What am I going to do now? I'll go to Paris!'

You gotta laugh because if you didn't you'd cry

Wikipedia celebrates its 12th birthday today. Of course, I have no idea if it's true. I read it on Wikipedia.