It seemed that I performed better sober than drunk. Who knew?

Look, there is nothing you can say about this show that I don't already know

There's just a feeling you get from certain things you do in life that just kind of feel pure and independent of what's actually, physically, going on.

Delaware Senate candidate Christine O'Donnell said recently that Hollywood needs to re-evaluate what they're doing because movies these days are all filled with gay sex and extramarital affairs. And I thought, 'Have fun in Congress then.

The Bible has been through at least half a dozen translations by the time you read it. Plus, when the word of God is infected by the hand of man, that is, written down, it is tainted.

Thank heaven Election Day is over. No more campaign ads, no more mud-slinging, no more candidates pretending they're straight. It's over!

I always appreciated my teachers. When I was 16, I gave them the greatest gift I could think of. I dropped out of school.