Welcome back, my cheeky wee monkeys.

There's a commercial break coming and I'm very excited about it and you know why? Because that's what keeps daddy in suits.

Occasionally, when I lived in London, I would have sex with a girl from an aristocratic family. I always enjoyed doing to them what their ancestors did to my country.

A friend of mine that I was in a band with started me on Kafka, which in turn led to Camus and Sartre.

A junkie will steal your purse, and then help you look for it.

I always wanted to make motion pictures, ever since I was a wee boy, and I was 32, and time was marching on. I met a guy who said, 'Come out to Hollywood for 10 days, and I'll get you a deal.' So I figured, 'OK, 10 days.' On the 10th day, he got me a development deal with Disney, not for a lot of money, but it allowed me to make the move.

Justin Bieber's tour bus was stopped by Canadian border patrol agents. And they found marijuana. The agents said Bieber was a disgrace to Canada and should never come back. Then they found the marijuana.