I didn't flee a dictator or swim an ocean to be an American like some do. I just thought long and hard about it.

I would prefer as a viewer to watch the mistakes. I am my own blooper reel, as it happens.

Appear tougher or cooler or funnier than you feel and there is a chance you'll make it.

...slow down and self-edit and ask yourself the three things you must always ask yourself before you say anything: "Does this need to be said?" "Does this need to be said by me?" "Does this need to be said by me now?"

Other than the laws of physics, rules have never really worked out for me.

Be careful who you choose as your hero or who you choose to deify, be it Clay Aiken or Barack Obama. You put all you're hope and all your dreams and all your ideas about stuff into one human being. They're a human being they're going to let you down. You can't make someone your hero because of something you read on the internet. The internet is not a source of information it is a source of disinformation.

Remember the band, Flock of Seagulls? They had their van stolen. I was like, They still have a van?