President Bush is not fazed by other candidates' war records. He said, I may have not fought in Vietnam, but I created one.

New rumors that Saddam Hussein is planning to flee to a castle in Libya with 10 billion dollars. Now President Bush doesn't know whether to nuke him or give him a tax cut.

The big political news, Arnold Schwarzenegger announced he's running for governor of California, and already, people are chanting, 'Four more vowels, four more vowels.

I have a wonderful respect for old people.

Critics say Arnold has no previous government experience, but advisers say he's clearly the most qualified Austrian, ex-Mr. Universe in the race.

The election is in full-swing. Republicans have taken out round-the-clock ads promoting George Bush. Don't we already have that? It's called Fox News.

President Bush spent last night calling world leaders to support the war with Iraq and it is sad when the most powerful man on earth is yelling, 'I know you're there, pick up, pick up.