Howard Dean is narrowing the field of potential running mates. It's down to Mike Tyson or Bobby Knight.

President Bush says in the last month he has created 300,000 new jobs. Yeah, they're called Kerry campaign workers.

As the Democrats get revved up at their convention in Boston, President Bush is fighting back the only way he knows how: by going on vacation! Ah, it's nice to take a rest, replenish your supply of smirks. The vacation was expected, because Bush traditionally takes a month off every summer to relax and avoid reading National Security Warnings.

This is so weird. I saw the new John Kerry campaign commercial and he says, 'I'm John Kerry and I approve of this message - if I have one.'

Today, John Kerry announced a fool-proof plan to wipe out the $500B deficit. John Kerry has a plan, he's going to put it on his wife's Gold Card.

Martha Stewart was convicted of four counts of lying and obstruction of justice and could serve up to 20 years in Congress.

I don't do well around the angry, bitter and emotionally fragile among us, which may eliminate 70% of the population.