Twitter is not a good place for people who feel they're being followed.

I used to fear living a life untouched by God, but now, for some reason I've gone back to being afraid of cement mixers.

The Cadillac Escalade is the perfect vehicle for a pimp with a growing family.

I want to leave the world as I entered it: naked and crying in a room full of strangers.

Maybe the next three Star Wars movies will tell the story of how the last three Star Wars movies got so shitty.

I used to pessimistically think I was going to die alone, but now I optimistically know I'm going to die hoping to meet someone.

Competition is the death of art.