That MySpace is the story of the year. Everyone but my mother is on it.

I did stand-up comedy for seventeen years. I need to explore other things.

I've always read books and loved human behavior since I was ten or twelve years old. Maybe even that's why I wanted to do comedy.

I've been ignoring my feelings lately. That works pretty well. Might also settle for less this week, just to try it out.

I'm glad that my parents missed one thing that was really unbelievable. They saw me hit this great success. It was a blast and we had a lot of laughs. And it was just an amazing time. They passed away. And then after I got, you know, famous, all these haters came out of nowhere.

You've gotta share what's going on in your mind.

I found someones passport on the ground tonight. Where do you sell these things?