Comedy crowds - we always want to come out and ask you, 'How you feeling?' We always say that, 'By a round of applause, how do you feel?' Right? 'By a round of applause, how you feeling?' It's the only place in the world that you judge how you're feeling by a round of applause... There's never like a car accident, people all over the ground, people running over - 'Ma'am! Ma'am! By a round of applause, how do you feel? By a round of applause - she's not clapping!

I don't like littering and I think it leads to terrorist activities.

Vince Vaughn is a genuine person, awesome guy. He'll come to a lot of my shows. It's not that often that you can meet someone as cool as Vince.

I'm focused on staying as healthy as I can so I can work more.

If you take a negative, turn it inside out, it's still a negative. You're just revealing the ugly inside of negative so I say keep it as is.

You must accept responsibility for your actions. This doesn't include reactions, interactions or transactions if you're thinkin' loophole.

I love singing along to the radio while I'm riding in the back of a squad car.