I think beating someone to death with a ukulele would just sound funny.

Drive, ego and cocksureness are all essential elements in terms of getting exactly what you want but losing everything you've got.

I can always get better. A lot of my ex-girlfriends don't think I'm funny.

Some girls look beautiful with no makeup on at all. I call them lazy. Now go throw some war paint on you bleak empty canvas you.

I'm a late-night guy.

When I'm wrong I'm like the Emperor on the Death Star thinking he'll turn Luke. Yet, when I'm right I'm a Jedi like my father before me.

Hi, I'm a buck tooth and I like to be outside past the lips.