Why do they call it the restroom? Is there anybody just resting in this room?

Strip clubs are great places to meet interesting people you only wanna know for about 40 minutes.

Nothing is a better icebreaker than a great joke.

Pain only hurts when you are looking for a reason to quit. You don't feel a thing when you know you can still win.

When you get hit by a car sometimes your shoes will fly off, sometimes your pants will come off, but I was not fortunate enough to see the pants portion.

Every joke has its origin - the punching people in the face joke. It hurts like hell to get punched in the face.

When you're not in love, when you don't have love, everybody you know falls in love.